Mistress, to be or not to be????

I sometimes wonder.  I started this blog because I was ordered to do so by Mistress Jessica. I would have done anything for her, I think. I wanted her to invite me to come to her town and train me. That was my fantasy and not hers.  She has since moved on and I miss her.  I read other blogs of gurls who are influenced by their mistress and I am so envious. On the other hand, if I were under their power I would not be able to do what they ask because of my situation. So I wonder, if I could ever have a mistress, if we could find a way for me to be trained and under her power I would cook and clean and ......




  I get so horny when I fantasize about fluffing for my mistress or cleaning up after she and her lover have finished. To lick the cum of another man from her pussy gets me so hard. Turning to him, I take him into my mouth to clean and stimulate for another round, oh my god how divine!  I envision a pallet made for me at the end of the bed, there I sit, lay, watch, a collar around my neck with a leash leading to my goddess.  She tugs, there i am at her service. so simple yet so far away.

Slutty today

I am feeling a little slutty today. I am reading blogs and getting so horny. where is that cock when I need one?  I am off to find a dildo and play.

Spinning

Once again I am posting with little to say but I can let you know what I am thinking about.  I had an opportunity to meet my first blowjob yesterday.  We had a wonderful conversation while lunching with friends.  It went well. I am not sure he knows he will be the first but the door is open and I have his number!!!!

I just want the opportunity to be me, regardless.  We should all get that chance.  I hope you all enjoy. 

Here We Go Again

With all the time I think i need today I want to write the most inspiring blog post ever.  But the trouble is I am unsure of what you want to hear.  I think this goes along with my not knowing where i am in life.
I so want this all to happen but i fear the end result.  I have been working toward this since the beginning but have not advanced far enough to suit me.  Much of my problem is I always worry about what you want to hear not about what i want to do or say. I think they call that people pleasing but my goal is to please those i am with so how can people pleasing be bad.

Our vacation went well except instead of thinking of my wife, I thought about cock and how wonderful it would be to run into one during our travels. I was standing on a ferry and a gentleman eyed me from afar, I smiled and he quickly looked away. I looked his way again a few moments later and again he was eyeing me. Now here we go this gets interesting as for the first time on the trip I thought about trying to lure his bbc to the bathroom for a quick blow job. I thought about it for days but by the time i made the decision he was gone. fucked another one up.

Those are the places my head was at during the entire trip. I even revisited the last time my second wife and I had sex.  She had already told me she was leaving, her father had offered her a house on the one condition, she didn't bring me.  while not quite to the level of devastated i was damaged. so I tied her up and slipped off to the other room, found a teddy and put it on. I then found her reddest lipstick and applied that.  I then returned to my little slave and we made love with me dressed like that, one of my first attempts at dressing as an adult. she liked it as i think she liked the lesbian action more than a little.  I had completely forgotten about this as I was mostly glad to see her gone.

 Back to normal now and still alone. At least i get the chance occasionally to write here on my blog.  I feel something is going to happen soon whether my wife catches me  and leaves or I just decide to leave on my own. But those are such big questions and there are no answers yet in my head.  Hope to hear from you all soon and thanks for listening. hugs and kisses

  

All alone

Oh so sexy laying on the bed but as with us who hide our dreams and desires hiding behind a facade of marriage, she is alone.  I like to feel all girly, giddy like a little school girl. But the bottom line is nothing. How long will I be content to jack off into my hand and lick my cum clean because I haven't done the footwork to get what I really want. A real man with a big cock which starts to throb and cum into my mouth. I don't just want, I absolutely must have it. I am a cock craving, cum loving, sissy faggot, cock whore and I want to live the part.

I would love to have implants so I could look like this.  Nice titties which would make me even more attractive, sexy and womanly.  I practice all the time to be a minceing little slut dressed in my 3" high heels and panties. I always wonder should I have done this all long ago.  I always come up with the answer "hell yes". But I didn't and today is today.

I hope you enjoy this. I will be unavailable for a short period so please comment and I will respond at some point in the future. hugs to all, Regina

Caps again, Threes a charm

I think this is going to work!!! I now present to you the infamous caps that Andy gifted me several days ago and I have been struggling to get to show. Thank you all for your patience. More importantly let's enjoy them as they are wonderful.

oh i so want to be her. 

I hope you are enjoying these as much as i do.  I have to attend that little tent in my lap. I hope my boss doesn't miss me while i am gone.

all mine

I am excited this morning. I like who I am becoming and it truly is a cock whore, a cum craving sissy. I found a little quiz the other day so I answered the questions honestly. I scored way higher than I thought because they were not about what my history was but what I would like to do in a given situation. How could I not score high. So I practice minceing around the house while my little wifey is away.  If she only new how much I want the cock above this to be mine or better yet in my mouth.  I most likely need a mistress to help me make these decisions, to help me be who I crave to be, quicker. I want it and I want it now.  I went by and rented a mailbox, this should help build a wardrobe faster. Holy crap I think I have slipped over the edge of the rabbit hole and falling, falling very fast and maybe a little out of control. It all makes my little clitty very wet, oozing precum. I need a real man NOW!!